C.P.G. § 3.3 — Communal Dish Treachery
Petty Infraction“A person is guilty of Communal Dish Treachery when, at a shared table, they (a) double-dip into a communal vessel after an established bite, (b) levy repeated 'just a taste' takings from another's plate having declined to order their own, or (c) eat directly from a pan intended for plating.”
Definitions
- “Established bite”.
- Any contact between the dipped item and the mouth. Science has ruled on this. The court follows the science.
Elements (proof required: a preponderance of the evidence)
- A communal vessel or another's plate was in play
- The accused dipped, tasted, or foraged beyond license
- The conduct was repeated or, in the case of double-dipping, even once
Recognized defenses
- The Broken-End Defense — the dipped end was broken off and a fresh end deployed (the maneuver must be demonstrated in court)
Aggravating circumstances
- The accused had been offered the chance to order their own and declined with 'I'm not hungry'
Sentencing guideline: Ordering mandates, dip forfeiture, and plate-perimeter restraining orders.
Sentences this court has been known to hand down
- a standing order to order their own fries for six (6) months
- forfeiture of all dip privileges at the next three shared meals
- a plate-perimeter restraining order of thirty (30) centimeters, enforceable by fork