C.P.G. § 4.3 — Misappropriation of Shared Entertainment
Petty Infraction“A person is guilty of Misappropriation of Shared Entertainment when they watch ahead in a series mutually undertaken, disclose plot developments to the unwatched, or establish hegemony over the remote control by strategic cushion placement.”
Elements (proof required: a preponderance of the evidence)
- The entertainment was mutually undertaken or the remote jointly owned
- The accused advanced alone, disclosed spoilers, or seized the remote
- The victim's viewing experience was materially diminished
Recognized defenses
- The Trailer Defense — the spoiled event was technically in the trailer
- The You-Were-Asleep Doctrine — sleeping through an episode constitutes waiver
Degrees
- First degree: Spoiling a finale, a twist, or a death; or watching ahead and then 'reacting naturally' during the joint rewatch.
- Second degree: Any other watching-ahead, spoiling, or remote seizure.
Aggravating circumstances
- The spoiler was delivered with visible enjoyment
- The phrase 'you weren't going to figure it out anyway' was uttered
Sentencing guideline: Forfeiture of the remote, mandatory accompanied rewatching, and a spoiler embargo enforceable by glare.
Sentences this court has been known to hand down
- a total spoiler embargo, plus accompanied rewatching of every episode watched alone
- surrender of the remote control for one month, cushion-fort privileges revoked
- a formal pre-viewing apology before each shared episode for one week